the intro...

Hello and welcome to my blog! I’m your hostess, Ladyface.

I'm a 27 year old queer femme sex worker. Between my fancypants day job and my super sexy side gig I spend a lot of time being an attentive, diplomatic Ladyface so this blog is where I’ll let my hair down...I might even curse. Though I curse like a kitten sneezes, which is too say it's infrequent and harmless and still shocks me more than anyone.

I am a sex positive lady and will write candidly about my kinks, my history, my exploits and my daily life (but only the good stuff). And so that I can write as openly as possibe, I'm keeping this space anonymous. All characters are real people in my life but all names are pseudonyms and always will be.




P.S. you can now follow me on Twitter! @1ladyface

Tuesday, February 7, 2012

on AA (archetypes/associations)

I’ve been a bad ladyface.  I’m trying to save up to move to San Francisco in June so in addition to my full time office job I’ve also been tutoring SAT and ACT on Saturdays and stripping on Sundays.  It wasn’t until I typed that that I realized what an odd combination that is.  Anyway, I haven’t had much downtime and I’ve neglected the bloggy blog, which is a shame because there’s SO MUCH to write about!  And I miss you readerfolk.  I think I said that in my last post too.  Also, I feel like a dick bag for not commenting on any of the other blogs of the lovely queers that I follow.  I don’t mean a strange but cozy cock sack knitted by a loving femmeface, I mean a bag full of gross severed tentacles.  That kinda dick bag.  Ewww.
So I’m gonna set some goals going forward and post them here to help hold me accountable because that’s what my life coach would tell me to do. 

The Ladyface Schedule:

Mascara Monday
-the day I go to work on 3-4 hours of sleep.  Of my stripper makeup the mascara is the hardest to get off so I go to work wearing a bit more mascara than the average office lady.  The goal for the day is just to stay awake. 
-yoga in the evening if I’m not too sleepy and sore from dancing

Fat Tuesday
-the one day I can eat whatever I want because I’ve spent the rest of the week eating millet flakes, soy yogurt and kale
-walk the dog

Writing Wednesday
-post on the blog
-walk the dog

Recovery Thurrrrrsday (okay that one’s not quite an alliteration)
            -Al Anon (Inmate 12004 and I were lovers and I didn’t realize until recently how much the year and a half we spent together is still affecting me.  Please read his blog:  He’s trying to get his life back on track and needs love and support now more than ever.)
-take out the trash and sometimes my nuvaring but not in that order
-walk the dog

Foot Fetish Friday
-reply to any foot fetish clients who have emailed me 
-pole dance class if I’m not scheduled at the strip club
-walk the dog

SAT Saturday
-strength and flexibility class if I’m not scheduled at the strip club
-walk the dog

Slutty Sunday
-take my pup for an epic run

Oh my goodness!  I just realized I never wrote about the end of the New Years Resolution.  It happened.  I’ll write about that and the audition process and the club and all that good stuff soon but those will be longer entries.  So for now:

On AA (archetypes/associations):
Isn’t it interesting what people project onto you?  I knew going into the stripping thing that I’d encounter all kinds of interesting fantasies but there have been a few surprises along the way.  So far each shift at least 3 separate people have told me I look “just like” Natalie Portman.  I don’t look like Natalie Portman, but it’s a very nice compliment.  Thank goodness for beer goggles and crummy lighting!  I am a slim brunette with a classic look and I do look much more vanilla than a lot of my super sexy coworkers who have tattoos and unnatural hair colors.  It would be more accurate to say that I look more like Natalie Portman than the majority of my coworkers and that they look more like Joan Jett than I do. 
Anyway, the Natalie Portman association is very flattering so I didn’t think I’d care what else they associate me with but I’ve had an unsettling surprise.  I go by Ava because it complements my look and it’s easy for men to remember.  I had Ava Gardner in mind when I chose the name; it has a classic feel but isn’t an immediate association.  
If I called myself Monroe or Bettie that would be a bit too obvious and pretentious.  But when I’ve introduced myself as Ava several men have said “Oh, like Eva Braun?”  Do you know who Eva Braun is?  I didn’t.  She was Hitlers lover.  
Yipes.  I would never date a man in a double breasted suit with pleated front pants and terrible facial hair.  So I guess I do care who patrons associate me with.  But really guys, I’m happy to give you a ridiculously raunchy lap dance and you can imagine me as a nurse or a school teacher or even your own mother but please don’t think of me as a Nazi, that makes me all kinds of uncomfortable.
This might soon be a moot point.  A few men have begun calling me Natalie Portland and it seems to be gaining momentum.  As far as I know she isn’t a Nazi, so that’s nice.

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