the intro...

Hello and welcome to my blog! I’m your hostess, Ladyface.

I'm a 27 year old queer femme sex worker. Between my fancypants day job and my super sexy side gig I spend a lot of time being an attentive, diplomatic Ladyface so this blog is where I’ll let my hair down...I might even curse. Though I curse like a kitten sneezes, which is too say it's infrequent and harmless and still shocks me more than anyone.

I am a sex positive lady and will write candidly about my kinks, my history, my exploits and my daily life (but only the good stuff). And so that I can write as openly as possibe, I'm keeping this space anonymous. All characters are real people in my life but all names are pseudonyms and always will be.




P.S. you can now follow me on Twitter! @1ladyface

Sunday, September 30, 2012

John School 101: How to Email a Ho

I get a lot of poorly written emails from potential clients.  Just this morning this was in my inbox: “hey baby, ur hot. Let’s skype.”  This is baffling to me.  I know the internet is the wild west of the sex industry but on the offchance that I’m a real human and that those pictures are really pictures of me wouldn’t you want to not blow that chance?  

It doesn’t even take that long to write a decent intro email and those extra three minutes of effort might just mean the difference between getting laid and getting blocked.  I looked for pre-existing resources but Emily Post is of no help on this subject, so in an effort to help the would-be-clients of the world get laid and pros not want to gouge their eyes out I've prepared a brief outline for writing a respectful, succinct, pertinent email to a ho.  It's based on the outline of a childs letter to a new penpal.
Really people, if this kid can do it, so can you. (and you don't even have to worry about breaking the pencil lead or referring back to a poster of the alphabet to make sure your Ns aren't backwards). 

Your initial email to a ho/pro should include:

-A bit about you and what you're into:
  I like nylons, sports cars, the color blue
-Fun facts!: 
  I love cockrings, I have herpes, I just made a sand castle
-Relevant questions for the ho/penpal:
  Do you do incall?  Do you do CBT?  Do you like the color blue?
-A nice sign off:
  I hope you’re doing well, I look forward to hearing from you, Hugs and Hi-C,

It should not include:

-Internet abbreviations
-Your autobiography

See?  Easy.  You're welcome.

*image from the North American Montessori Center